Letting go

We have no word from Z yet. I have been in contact with a Pennsylvania detective to make sure none of us need to prepare for a legal hassle if Rebecca does decide to leave...we don't. Rebecca is 20 years old and free to leave if she chooses. Free...what a small word with a heavy meaning! Naeemah has received a lot of information in these last 2 days. What a blow, to say the least. I can't imagine the anger she must feel...different from my own. She is wants to see this all go to trial. She is still in the place where revenge is the only thing that will soothe her anger. It is a place in our hearts, when we love someone, that we need to pass through. I describe it best as a mother. If someone, anyone, were to harm my child...my first reaction would be to rip the perpetrator to shreds. How dare you have no respect for what I love most in this world? I feel the same about my siblings. The desire in my soul is to protect them. I have failed in the past. I didn't protect them when they needed me. I do it now! As Naeemah gets more and more involved and intertwined with all of this I realize something...I will have to give her my sister. If I rescue Rebecca...I will have to let her go again, to someone else. Letting go...like ripping off my own arm...it feels like! Letting her go...trusting that she will be safe...trusting in a God that I cannot see with my own eyes will watch over her with His. Letting her go...because I love her. Letting her go because that is what is best for her. Letting her go...so another sister can see her everyday and watch her grow away from her past...letting her go. It isn't the end but I have been there all this time. God let me mourn this now. Let me mourn that I am not the only sister now. Give Rebecca the best life. Give Rebecca the courage to walk away. Give Rebecca a taste of the joy a life in freedom will give her everyday. Give Rebecca to Naeemah. Restore that family with its last missing member. Restoration...I prayed for this but I never had in mind that you would restore it outside my family. God, you will take care of her. God, I know...God bring her out of the prison the is in now...I will let her go...because of my love for her.